Sean+Li

Can the people of waknuk be forgiven for their horrible behaviour? Defend or prosecute them. They were unaware of their doings

Thesis: The people of waknuk are unaware of their wrong doings, therefore, should be forgiven for their behaviours. (why?) Good thesis, start writing your intro

5. First Draft of your Essay

In the chrysalids, the people of waknuk use cruel methods to torture and sterilize those whom- (get rid of who) who they consider to be get rid of to be “mutants”. Are inadvertent and unaware of their doings; therefore I believe they should not be punished for their behaviors. Don't start a sentence with are. You can't say I in an essay so get rid of I believe. Humans are by nature territorial animals. Ever since the tribal ages, tribes have been fighting others for resources, land and power. This is a natural part of who we are. We have developed a fear for others who (look different) differentiate ﻿ from us, (And thats whats happening in waknuk.) Start a new sentence.eg. This is precisely what is happening in

new intro:

Getting second chance s is among one of the most difficult challenge a person must face, yet it can be one of the most life changing as well. Everyone will need second chances and will come to realize that the bigger their mistake is, the harder it is to get another chance. The people of Waknuk committed some terrible crimes against ones who are considered “mutants”. Their wrong concepts of “The norm is the will of god and the devil is the father of deviation ” came from the book “Nicholson’s Repentance”. It's this idea that causes the citizens to commit such terrible crimes, they were inadvertent therefore should be forgiven for their crimes.

Religion is one of the most powerful motivational forces known to man. Like how Karl Marx put it " Religion is the opium of the people" no quote in topic sentence. It's so powerful because it provides individuals with peace and confidence in the face of a challenge and hardship; it gives meanings to their everyday lives. In the case of Waknuk, The book "Nicholson's Repentances" took this powerful force of motivation and manipulated it in many wrong ways. It states in the book "Any creature that shall seem to be human, but is not formed thus is not human. it is neither man nor woman. It is blasphemy against the true Image of God, and hateful in the sight of God." It took religion and used it as a weapon against the "mutants". Under the deception of this competent force, the people of Waknuk tortured and evicted anyone that does not fit the description of the true image. Under the impression, they think they are acting out the will of god.

The phrase "One bad apple ruins a bunch" means that one person causing harm can affect a whole group of people, and that's the case in Waknuk. David's father Joseph Strorm is a perfect example of this. He is man with great perseverance in his faith. As David states "My father's faith was bred into his bones, his principles were his sinews, and both responded to a mind richly stored with examples from the Bible, and from Nicholson's Repentances." Sadly buried in the hole he dug him self into, he would not realize that this concept he believes in is wrong. Not everyone in Waknuk is like that, for instance uncle axle is one of the clever few among the crowd. as he states "

Second:

Getting second chance s is among one of the most difficult challenge a person must face, yet it can be one of the most life changing as well. Everyone will need second chances and will come to realize that the bigger their mistake is, the harder it is to get another chance. The people of Waknuk committed some terrible crimes against ones who are considered “mutants”. Their wrong concepts of “The norm is the will of god and the devil is the father of deviation ” came from the book “Nicholson’s Repentance”. It's this idea that causes the citizens to commit such terrible crimes, they were inadvertent therefore should be forgiven for their crimes.

Religion is one of the most powerful motivational forces known to man. Like how Karl Marx put it " Religion is the opium of the people" no quote in topic sentence. It's so powerful because it provides individuals with peace and confidence in the face of a challenge and hardship; it gives meanings to their everyday lives. In the case of Waknuk, The book "Nicholson's Repentances" took this powerful force of motivation and manipulated it in many wrong ways. It states in the book "Any creature that shall seem to be human, but is not formed thus is not human. it is neither man nor woman. It is blasphemy against the true Image of God, and hateful in the sight of God." It took religion and used it as a weapon against the "mutants". Under the deception of this competent force, the people of Waknuk tortured and evicted anyone that does not fit the description of the true image. Under the impression, they think they are acting out the will of god.

The phrase "One bad apple ruins a bunch" means that one person causing harm can affect a whole group of people, and that's the case in Waknuk. David's father Joseph Strorm is a perfect example of this. He is man with great perseverance in his faith. His son David states: "My father's faith was bred into his bones, his principles were his sinews, and both responded to a mind richly stored with examples from the Bible, and from Nicholson's Repentances." Sadly buried in the hole he dug himself into, he would not realize that this concept he believes in is wrong. However Not everyone in Waknuk is like Joseph, for instance uncle axle is one of the clever ones among the crowd; “What do you think it is that makes a man a man?” I started on the Definition. He cut me off after five words. “It’s not!” He said. “A wax figure could have all that, and he’d still be a wax figure, wouldn’t he?” “I suppose he would.” Well, then, what makes a man a man is something //inside// him.” “A soul?” I suggested. “No,” he said, “souls are just counters for churches to collect, all the same value, like nails. No, what makes a man man is mind; it's not a thing, it’s a quality, and minds aren’t all the same value; they’re better or worse, and the better they are, the more they mean” (pg.80). He understands the true value that makes people great. There is still good people left in waknuk, they shouldn't be punished for the wrong doings of others.

Paragraph 3 how are we gonna acomplish anything by punishing them for their crimes? " I object to violence because when it appears to do good, the good is only temporary; the evil it does is permanent."-Gandhi 

Waknuk. 6. Peer Comments - Group Members - Katrina Cirone - Cameron So - Matthew Chun

Katrina Cirone - Introduction Paragraph 1.Does the introduction paragraph grab your attention? Does it anticipates an insightful thesis? Good beginning sentence. Maybe talk about how they discriminate against them also. More infromation is needed leading up to the thesis. 2.How strong is the development of the argument for the whole essay? Develope the idea more in the intro

Cameron So - Body Paragraphs 1.How well are the quotations integrated and analysed? Have they been chosen with care and taken from a variety of chapters? 2.How strong is the development of the argument for the whole essay?

Matthew Chun - Concluding Paragraph 1.Does the conclusion include a reworded thesis, summary. 2. Does the conclusion have a memorable ending? 3.How strong is the development of the argument for the whole essay?

7. Good Copy in MLA format