Genevieve+Pai

//__** Chrysalids Essay **__//


 * __Name:__ Genevieve Pai**

__**Topic:**__
 * 1) 4 Women are important to David Strorm. Discuss the effects of three women on his life. What does each woman do for David?

__**Brainstorming Worksheet /**__ __**Essay Outline**__


 * Thesis**: In the Chrysalids, Sophie, Aunt Harriet, and the Sealand woman are three important women in David's life whose various perspectives influence his views and opinions on his society. good thesis, just write out the #3, one to ten are usually written out

__Women in general (addition):__ - culture defines a woman as a sensitive person <- (this is a point that is crucial in Aunt Harriet's case as her situation was invoked by her maternal instinct) -teachers, and guides who are crucial to growing up, as mothers are a huge influence in nurturing their children
 * 1. Introductory Paragraph:**

In the society of Waknuk, discrimination is displayed heavily through their intolerance of the smallest 'deviations' - Deviational crops and animals were immediately burned if they showed the slightest differences from what was considered of the norm. - But proof of how far they take this form of intolerance is clearly exhibited as they turn to their own kind: humans. - With this act, suspicions and fear is constant in their society. - Those in desperation to root out those that have differences to keep themselves 'pure', and those in desperation to conceal their secrets. - These are two sides in Waknuk that clash to lead into extreme circumstances/ consequences. - Brought up with such a belief (as his father has the greatest impact on their society) **<- necessary?**, David endures endless pressure to follow the exact beliefs that his father has. - Despite of this, as he continues to grow and understand more about how morally wrong Waknuk's concepts are, David's morals prevail against the pressure of society. - There are three important women in David's life that help to shape David's views: Sophie, Aunt Harriet and the Sealand woman. - In the Chrysalids, Sophie, Aunt Harriet, and the Sealand woman are three important women in David's life whose various perspectives influence his views and opinions on his society. great ideas, but it needs to be structured as a funnel paragraph. Maybe start talking about women in general, and then move into the novel

"A blasphemy was, as had been impressed upon me often enough, a frightful thing. Yet there was nothing frightful about Sophie. She was simply an ordinary girl - if a great deal more sensible and braver than most." -taken from //The Chrysalids (pg. 14)// (^ shows David's thoughts and puzzlement of the definition of blasphemy as he had been introduced to- in comparison to the way Sophie was)
 * 2. Body Paragraph: Sophie**

- Sophie was the first to allow doubt about Waknuk's religion seep into David's mind at a very young age. - The fact that he was exposed to her perspective in such an early point of his life affected him, in the way that it started doubts to germinate in his mind. - She introduced him to the perspective from a victim's point-of-view, and in this way, had David questioning. - The way that David had been taught had seemed credible, yet at the same time, completely blown out of proportion. - Having a simple fact of a sixth toe, yet still being normal at the same time showed David how deviations are really just like everyone else, and not that much different in any way. - Seeing Sophie's and her family's extreme effort in hiding Sophie's condition and fear of being caught struck David. - His sympathy to their circumstances altered his previous thoughts against deviations.

"This is the third time. They'll take my baby away again like they took the others. I can't stand that - not again. Henry will turn me out, I think. He'll find another wife, who can give him proper children. There'll be nothing- nothing in the world for me - nothing. I came here hoping against hope for sympathy and help. Emily is the only person who can help me. I - I can see now how foolish I was to hope at all..." -taken from //The Chrysalids (pg. 71-72)// (^ words of desperation from a woman that has been backed into a corner with no way out; excerpt of all her feelings and instinctual protection for her child) "I shall pray,' she said. 'Yes, I shall pray.' She paused, then she went on, her voice steady and harder: 'I shall pray God to send charity into this hideous world, and sympathy for the weak, and love for the unhappy and unfortunate. I shall ask Him if it is indeed His will that a child should suffer and its soul be damned for a little blemish of the body... And I shall pray Him, too, that the hearts of the self-righteous may be broken..." -taken from //The Chrysalids (pg. 73)//
 * 3.** **Body Paragraph: Aunt Harriet**

-This situation with Aunt Harriet was the second blow that affected David's thoughts. -David had always held a sort-of fond affection for Aunt Harriet as her personality was a huge contrast from her sister: David's mother. -Aunt Harriet had a more welcoming and softer personality than his mother, in other words, a more motherly nature. -Aunt Harriet represents the natural stereotype for a women: sensitivity and compassion. -Those two characteristics explain how her situation was invoked by her maternal instinct to protect her child. -A mother's pain of losing a child is unimaginable, and Aunt Harriet's past experiences with losing two other children due to small 'deviations' drove her into desperation for trying any way possible to save her third child. -David's natural morals allow him to sympathize with Aunt Harriet's instinct of protectiveness. -Aunt Harriet's defiance in her right to be unashamed of her inadequate attempts to save her child proved her realization of the faults in Waknuk's religion. -^showed how she did not hold the same views as Waknuk, and demonstrated her disapproving opinions on their religion -Aunt Harriet's death impacted David greatly. -Her death symbolized the unhappiness/misery and results in a situation where one challenges the judgment of the society. -Through the tragic event of her death, David becomes more conscious to corruptness of his society's religion, hidden under the facade of 'retaining purity'.


 * 4.** **Body Paragraph: The Sealand woman**

-The third influential woman that helps in shaping David's views, is a mysterious foreigner named as 'The Sealand woman' in the Chrysalids. -It is David's sister, Petra, who acquaints David to another completely different society across the globe: Sealand (Zealand) -Sealand is a society where 'deviations' such as them are not just accepted, but encouraged, honoured and respected. -Informed of this new discovery, David discerns just how narrow Waknuk's concepts are, how shut-out and stubborn they are to disregard any differences or beliefs other than their own. -In another aspect, where David converses with the Sealand woman, the Sealand woman provides her blunt outlook on Waknuk's self-destructive system. (pg.182) -Her strong opinion of Waknuk showed how all societies/communities hold their own opinions and beliefs resolutely, which proved to David that Waknuk's principles are no excuse for all the inhumanity it has caused as they have not been ascertained.


 * 5. Concluding Paragraph:**

-Sophie, Aunt Harriet and the Sealand woman are crucial to David's life, as they expand David's views to permit him to comprehend the twisted and opinionated society of Waknuk. -

__**First Draft of your Essay**__

__Introductory Paragraph v1:__

In the society of Waknuk, discrimination is displayed heavily through their intolerance of the smallest 'deviations'. Deviational crops and animals were immediately burned if they showed the slightest differences from what was considered of the norm. But proof of how far they take this form of intolerance is clearly exhibited as they turn on their own kind: humans. With this act, suspicions and fear is constant in their society. There are those in desperation to root out those that have differences to keep themselves 'pure', and those in desperation to conceal their secrets.These two sides in Waknuk clash repeatedly- to result in extreme consequences. Brought up with such a belief, David endures endless pressure to follow the exact beliefs that his father has. Despite this, as he continues to grow and understand more about how morally wrong Waknuk's concepts are, David's morals prevail against the pressure of society.There are three important women in David's life that help to shape David's views: Sophie, Aunt Harriet and the Sealand woman.In the Chrysalids, Sophie, Aunt Harriet, and the Sealand woman are three important women in David's life whose various situations influence his views and opinions on his society. You have to use the funnel format for your intro. Remember to start broader than narrow down to Waknuk and the 3 women.

__Introductory Paragraph v2:__


 * The roles of women in society are often categorized as the teachers and **the mother-figures. In most cases, one would say that the most influential person in their lives would be their mother: their guide and support throughout the journey of their life. In the ChrysaIids, there are three important women in David's life that help to shape David's views: Sophie, Aunt Harriet, and the Sealand woman. In the society of Waknuk, discrimination is displayed heavily through their intolerance of the smallest 'deviations'. Deviational crops and animals were immediately burned if they showed the slightest differences from what was considered of the norm. But proof of how far they take this form of intolerance is clearly exhibited as they turn on their own kind: humans. With this act, suspicions and fear is constant in their society. There are those in desperation to root out those that have differences to keep themselves 'pure', and those in desperation to conceal their secrets.These two sides in Waknuk clash repeatedly- to result in extreme consequences. Brought up with such a belief, David endures endless pressure to follow the exact beliefs that his father has. Despite of this, as he continues to grow and understand more about how morally wrong Waknuk's concepts are, David's morals prevail against the pressure of society.In the Chrysalids, Sophie, Aunt Harriet, and the Sealand woman are three important women in David's life whose various situations influence his views and opinions on his society.

__Body Paragraph: Sophie v1:__

"A blasphemy was, as had been impressed upon me often enough, a frightful thing. Yet there was nothing frightful about Sophie. She was simply an ordinary girl - if a great deal more sensible and braver than most." -taken from //The Chrysalids (pg. 14)//

This quote represents David's thoughts and puzzlement of the definition of blasphemy as he had been taught- in comparison to the obvious normalcy that Sophie displays. Sophie was in  kee p things in present tense the first person ..? sounds better XD to allow doubt about Waknuk's religion seep into David's mind at a very young age.The fact that he was exposed to her perspective in such an early point of his life, affected him in the way that doubts started to germinate in his mind he also started to germinate doubts in his mind .She introduced him to t he perspective from a victim's point-of-view, and in this way, had David questioning.The way that David had been taught seemed credible, yet at the same time, completely blown out of proportion. Having a simple fact of a sixth toe, yet still being normal at the same time showed David how deviations are really just like everyone else, and not that much different in any way. Seeing Sophie's and her family's extreme effort in hiding Sophie's condition and fear of being caught struck David. His sympathy to their predicament altered his previous thoughts against deviations. Even thought your evidences aren't in quotation form, you still need to write the page numbers.

__Body Paragraph: Sophie v2:__

"I was abruptly perturbed - and considerably puzzled, too. A blasphemy was, as had been impressed upon me often enough, a frightful thing. Yet there was nothing frightful about Sophie. She was simply an ordinary little girl - if a great deal more sensible and braver than most. Yet, according to the Definition... Clearly there must be a mistake somewhere. Surely having one very small toe extra - well, two very small toes, because I supposed there would be one to match on the other foot - surely that couldn't be enough to make her 'hateful in the sight of God...'? The ways of the world were very puzzling... " - David's thoughts on Sophie; taken from //The Chrysalids (pg. 14)//

This quote represents David's thoughts and confusion of the definition of blasphemy as he had been taught- in comparison to the obvious normalcy that Sophie displayed. Sophie plays the part in being the first woman to introduce David to a victim's point-of-view in a society run such as Waknuk. In exposure to this alternate perspective,David is compelled to have second thoughts about his original teachings. Amidst his turmoil, Sophie's relationship to David as a close friend allows sentimental attachment to cause David to impulsively side with her situation. Seeing Sophie's and her family's extreme effort in hiding Sophie's condition and fear of being caught struck David (pg. 9-13). His sympathy to their predicament altered his previous thoughts against deviations.Having a simple exception of a sixth toe, yet still otherwise being completely normal at the same time, showed David how deviations are really just like everyone else, and not that much different in any way. Sophie was the first woman to introduce a victim's point-of-view to David.The fact that he was exposed to her perspective in such an early point of his life, affected him in the way that it opened his mind to questions concerning Waknuk's belief in the Definition for the future.

__Body Paragraph: Aunt Harriet v1:__

'This is the third time. They'll take my baby away again like they took the others. I can't stand that - not again. Henry will turn me out, I think. He'll find another wife, who can give him proper children. There'll be nothing- nothing in the world for me - nothing. I came here hoping against hope for sympathy and help. Emily is the only person who can help me. I - I can see now how foolish I was to hope at all...' -Aunt Harriet's plead; taken from //The Chrysalids (pg. 71-72)//

The intense situation that David witnessed of Aunt Harriet's and his parents' conflict, was the second blow that affected David's thoughts. David had always held a sort-of fond affection for Aunt Harriet as her personality was a huge contrast from her sister, David's mother, which might have been a reason why the impact of her death had afflicted David so much. Aunt Harriet's death was evidence as to the misery and results in a situation when one challenges the judgment of the society. Aunt Harriet's defiance in her right to be unashamed of her inadequate attempts to save her child proved her realization of the faults in Waknuk's religion. At the point where she was about to leave and had hardened her resolve, the second quote showed how she did not hold the same views as Waknuk, and demonstrated her disapproving opinions on how their religion was carried out to such a degree as to cause a mother's pain. " 'I shall pray,' she said. 'Yes, I shall pray.' She paused, then she went on, her voice steady and harder: 'I shall pray God to send charity into this hideous world, and sympathy for the weak, and love for the unhappy and unfortunate. I shall ask Him if it is indeed His will that a child should suffer and its soul be damned for a little blemish of the body... And I shall pray Him, too, that the hearts of the self-righteous may be broken...'" -Aunt Harriet's retort; taken from //The Chrysalids (pg. 73)// Through the tragic event of her death, David becomes more conscious to the corruptness of his society's religion, hidden under the facade of 'retaining purity'.

__Body Paragraph: The Sealand woman v1:__

The third influential woman that helped in shaping David's views, is a mysterious foreigner known as 'The Sealand woman' in the Chrysalids.It is David's sister, Petra, who acquaints David to another completely different society from Waknuk across the globe named: Sealand (New Zealand). Sealand is a society where 'deviations' such as them are not just accepted, but encouraged, honoured and respected. Informed of this new discovery, David discerns just how narrow Waknuk's concepts are, how shut-out and stubborn they are to disregard any differences or beliefs other than their own. In another aspect, when David converses with the Sealand woman, the Sealand woman provides her blunt outlook on Waknuk's self-destructive and 'ancient' system. (pg.182) Her strong opinion of Waknuk showed how all societies hold their own opinions and beliefs resolutely, which proved to David that Waknuk's principles are no excuse for all the inhumanity it has caused as they have not been ascertained yet.

Concluding Paragraph:

Sophie, Aunt Harriet and the Sealand woman are three women who are crucial to David's life, as they expand David's views to permit him to comprehend the twisted and opinionated society of Waknuk- which in turn, allows him to form his own opinions and beliefs. In each perspective, David is provided with evidence against the unrighteous judgments of his society.In Sophie's case, she showed him how deviations are really just normal people who don't deserve their branded treatment of cruelty. With Aunt Harriet, David witnessed the results of defying Waknuk`s principles and the view-point from a victim in desperation to find another way out. In final, the Sealand woman introduces him to another society`s beliefs: their acceptation and even encouragement for differences. The Sealand woman provides the final evidence in proving that all societies have their own principles, which means that Waknuk`s precepts cannot be the only perspective to be followed. The influence of these three women on David magnified his approach on Waknuk`s religion, and revealed other directions that differ from Waknuk`s. As quoted from the book, //A Young Lady`s Mentor// written by A Lady, ``Whatever may be the customs and laws of a country, women always give the tone to morals. Whether slaves or free, they reign, because their empire is that of the affections. This influence, however, is more or less salutary, according to the degree of esteem in which they are held:--they make men what they are... A man takes counsel with his wife; he obeys his mother; he obeys her long after she has ceased to live, and the ideas which he has received from her become principles stronger even than his passions...`` the influence of women have always proven to be vital to the growth of one`s life and later principles.

__**Peer Comments - Group Members**__

1.Does the introduction paragraph grab your attention? Does it anticipates an insightful thesis? 2.How strong is the development of the argument for the whole essay? 1.How well are the quotations integrated and analysed? Have they been chosen with care and taken from a variety of chapters? 2.How strong is the development of the argument for the whole essay? 1.Does the conclusion include a reworded thesis, summary. 2. Does the conclusion have a memorable ending? 3.How strong is the development of the argument for the whole essay?
 * Jesslyn - Introduction Paragraph **
 * Susan - Body Paragraphs **
 * Erick - Concluding Paragraph **

__**Good Copy in MLA format**__